Achtung! Ehrendoktor Hamlin David Schreiben III -- Vas do you tinken ov vas deez patient, Frau Carola Schlieber, hass to zay?:

"First, let me state very clearly that I have seen very little of the infamous purple dinosaur. Nor do I have children of any age. But here is my sure-to-be-panned opinion about Barney, based on the little I know about him.
1) Barney may look saccharine, sickly sweet and stupid to adults, but kids cannot discern this. The idea of "hypocrisy" is irrelevant to a three-year-old or a four-year-old. Children at that age, I would guess, see happy, smiling people as... HAPPY, SMILING PEOPLE. Barney is not meant for adults. The children's programs that adults like contain jokes and references that are deliberate bones thrown out to the poor parents who have to watch them. And I'm not denying that these types of programs are "better" than Barney. But Barney doesn't bother with that. He's for kids--small kids, pre-schoolers, kids young enough to have not the slightest hint of cynicism or film criticism in their natures. I find it significant that the newspaper advertisements for the recent Barney movie contained none of the usual glowing quotes from film critics--only quotes from children under six.
2) In the words of a popular PC maxim, "We fear what we do not understand." Barney has generated an enormous amount of hatred among adults. We don't understand why this obviously stupid, shallow, ugly, monstrous thing holds such an incredible attraction for children... and it's scary. It's like I feel at the church where I play the piano when the minister tells a joke in Spanish and forgets to translate it. Everyone laughs, and I sit there wondering why. Hearing Barney, I would guess, is like hearing a joke in a foreign language we never learned. Or worse, in one we've forgotten.
3) There are worse things than Barney. Lots of them. Like taking preschoolers to a long, loud, scary movie, and yelling at them or hitting them when they start crying in terror. I've seen it. Now THAT'S scary.
4) The Barney years are very short. Love of Barney--like belief in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny--will evaporate with the first disdainful remark from a peer: "Oh, Barney... he's for babies." Someday I predict that at least one of you will find an old box of Barney videos up in the attic, and sigh. Then you'll go downstairs, help your daughter zip up her prom dress, and wonder where the years went."

Honorary Doctor Henry David Spells III: One can easily recognize her complete Ego-driven faith in the absolute innocence of children. Indulging in this fantasy, she makes no mention of the fact that kids sometimes exhibit a propensity for shaving cats. This represents a denial of the dual nature of "mankind" as seen in children.
She repeatedly defends the innocence of the child by saying "we do not understand". She draws an analogy to help us understand but this represents a circle that shuts us out. Id-driven, this might be a partial representation of her communcation style. Or perhaps it is a manifestation of a shape-fixation or cookie-fixation or maybe she just thinks circles are realy cool...
Perhaps Carol sees children representing all that is good in our society -- a glimmer of what Christ was talking about when he said "unless you become as a little child you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
No one can deny that "there are worse things than Barney." Statement of a fact that no one can deny seems to give validity to her proof but it only tests the boundary conditions (extreme evil). Ambivalence? Or manifestation of desire for a more neutral point of view of Barney? Super-ego manifestation here indicates a positive maternal future for the patient.
She seems to manifest a deeply-repressed childhood psychic trauma which may have lead to the ego becoming an arena of intrapsychic conflict between the intruding id, the threatening superego, and the powerful influences emanating from the surrounding environment, which caused her to suspend belief in the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus, which in turn has created mortality phobias. Belief in the Tooth Fairy seems to be intact, which no doubt accounts for her splendid oral hygiene.
Very interesting.

WHAT IF SIGMUND FREUD HAD BEEN BORN IN THE AGE OF BARNEY...

1856-1858
Sigmund Freud is born on May 6, 1856 in Freiberg, Moravia (now Pribor in the Czech Republic) and placed in a Luvs brand Barney diaper, forever melding Barney with the concept of anal retentiveness and fixation.

1859-1865
The Freuds move to Vienna in 1860. In the coffeehouses and bookstores on nearly every corner of the artsy Austrian city, people argue the merits of Barney.

1866-1872
Freud begins a friendship with his classmate Eduard Silberstein. They teach themselves Spanish and begin writing each other letters in Spanish. Freud wrote of this friendship: "We...had our own mythology and secret names which we drew from a dialogue of the great Cervantes. In our Spanish reading book we once discovered a humourous philosophical conversation between two dogs lying contemplatively at the gates of a hospital and we adopted their names; in written and spoken communications he was called Berganza and I Cipion. ... Together we formed a peculiar learned society, the Academia Castellana /AC/, wrote together jocular literature which must still be among my old papers, shared our frugal suppers together and were never bored." (to Martha Bernays 7.2.1884) Proof Freud had an imagination and had learned "how to play pretend."

1873-1875
In 1873 Freud passes his Matura (school leaving certificate) and enters Vienna University. However, many of his classmates remain after school every day waiting for the Great Purple One to show up.

1881-1882
In 1881 Freud qualifies as doctor of medicine. Green and purple lollipops seem the most popular treat for the young children, forever melding Barney with the concept of oral fixation.

1884-1885
Barney's "Smores" song reverberating endlessly in his nightmares and fantasies, Freud researches the medicinal effects of coca. Later discovering chocolate comes from cacao , not you know what , Freud is heard to say "Never mind."

1886
Marriage to Martha Bernays. "I love you, you love me, we're a happy family..."

1887-1888
Freud becomes interested in hypnotherapy.

1891-1892
Move to Berggasse 19.

1893-1894
Works together with Josef Breuer on Studies in BJ Hysteria.

1895
Freud manages for the first time to analyse one of his own dreams involving BJ, peaches, and a blender.

1896
Freud's first use of the term "psychoanalysis".

1897
Freud begins his self-analysis after recurring BJ/blender nightmares.

1898
Publishes The Psychical Mechanism of Forgetting BJ.

1899-1900
The first copies of The Interpretation of BJ Dreams appear, post-dated 1900.

1901
Freud begins the analysis of the eighteen-year-old Dora, who shows up for every session in fuschia ballet shoes, clutches a yellow blankey and believes she is perpetually three-years-old.

1902
Founding of the Wednesday Psychological Society. Anyone of sallow complexion wearing red high top sneakers and a red baseball cap is thrown out.

1905
Three Essays on the Theory of Sexuality, Jokes and their Relation to the Unconscious and Fragments of an Analysis of a Case of BJ Hysteria ('Dora with a Yellow Blankey') appear.

1906
C.G. Jung begins his correspondence with Freud. Appears quite sincere and sure of who he is.

1907
Publication of Delusion and BJ Dreams in W. Jensen's 'Gradiva'.

1908
The First Congress of "Freudian Psychology" takes place in Salzburg. Reports of Barney, Sigmund, and Maria von Trapp prancing about singing "Do re mi."

1912
Founding of the psychoanalytical journal Imago, with its occasional newsletter "Areyouago."

1913
Break with C.G. Jung. Turns out he wasn't Jung at heart.

1914
BJ seen in Sarajevo on June 28, 1914. Outbreak of the First World War. Beginnings of antiBarnetic sentiment.

1916
The first part of Introductory Lectures on Purple Psychoanalysis appears.

1917
Georg Groddeck joins the purple psychoanalytical movement. BJ joins the Austrian State Bond Board.

1918
Freud loses his entire fortune which was tied up in Austrian State Bonds.

1922
Freud is working on A Seventeenth-Century Demonological Neurosis.

1924
A conflict with Otto Rank over the meaning of the birth trauma breaks out in psychoanalysis. Freud insists birth trauma is directly related to BJ. Otto Rank insists birth trauma is related to Barney. Later studies concluded it was Teletubbies.

1926
On his 70th birthday Freud receives various honours and a Barney cake.

1929
Arnold Zweig publishes an essay entitled Freud and Humankind in which he celebrates Freud as a liberator from religious, pathological, and BJ-related terror.

1930
A heart attack forces Freud to give up smoking. Barney wants to know what was up with that cigar anyway.

1933
Hitler becomes Reichs Chancellor. Red high top sneakers peak out from under his trousers.

Freud corresponds with Einstein on the question "Why War?".

1935
Freud is elected Honorary Member of the British Royal Society of Medicine. Almost declines when he discovers the British are responsible for Teletubbies.

1936
Thomas Mann gives a celebratory address in the Concert Hall on "Freud and the Future". Nazi gangs raided libraries and burned "un-German" books, including the works of Thomas Mann

1937
Together with Dorothy Burlingham, Anna Freud opens the "Jackson Nursery" on the Rudolfsplatz, a kindergarten in which she can begin her study of Barney's effect on aspects of infant behaviour.

1938
The Austrian Chancellor Schuschnigg is forced by Hitler (red sneakers barely visible) to resign. Austria is annexed to the German Reich on 13th March.

A wave of political arrests and antisemitic/antibarnetic persecution breaks out. Freud's apartment and the Vienna Psychoanalytic Society are searched. Anna Freud is held for a day by the Gestapo for questioning. She has recurring nightmares of goosestepping red high tops for the rest of her life.

1939
On 23rd September Freud dies. His last words..."Why is Barney called 'purple' when he's 'magenta'?...ack."

Legitimate Freud Links

Legitimate Freud Chronology

Legitimate Timeline and Photographs of WWI

No laughing matter -- USHMM. Because those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Access Museum Resources to search photographic archives.

Legitimate History and Photographs of WWII

In the spirit of Vienna, world capitol of coffeehouses and bookstores... Sigmund Freud at the Lucidcafe ...literature, music, and coffee